Look at the smug grin slapped across this chump's face. That's the smugness brought on as a by-product of selling over 30 MILLION albums worldwide. Yes, Ladies and Gentlemen, it's everyone's favourite drive-time dickhead, Chris Rea. It's hard to put into words my particular dislike of this artist without reeling off an infinite stream of expletives, but I shall try my best.
Chris Rea's well-honed brand of 'Soft Rock' has been polluting my ears for longer than I care to remember. I can recall growing up during the 80's, on road trips with my family listening to one of three tapes : Fleetwood Mac's 'Rumours', Dire Straits' 'Brothers In Arms' and Paul Simon's 'Graceland'. All of these albums still hold a lot of memories for me, some good, some bad but mostly they make me think of motorways. Dire Straits and Chris Rea are often lumped in together - both have that lazy-blues-mid-tempo-boogie-woogie element to their music, but where Dire Straits tend to employ that only on about half of their output, Chris Rea doesn't hold back. This gimp applies it liberally over nearly EVERYTHING he has ever produced. Both have that same 'Is he singing or is he speaking' vocal style. Maybe they should have teamed up, and called themselves Dire Rea. That's enough about Dire Straits. I quite like about 4 of their songs, so we'll leave them alone. Back to the main focus.
It's the mid-paced tempo that really offends. It's almost as if it has been purposefully used to soundtrack the drive home after work as you sit in your Mondeo, crawling along some A-road with a thousand other middle-aged wankers like yourself somewhere in Berkshire. Listen to how shit this is! It's unbearable.
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